How to Get Your Ex Back Without Looking Desperate.

When you decide you want to figure out how to get your ex back, the key thing you must avoid at all costs is looking desperate. If they get the impression that you are needy, it's likely to be a big turnoff and drive the ex further away.

Since that is clearly not what you want to do, read and follow the tips in this article so you have the best chance of winning your ex back.

First: The first thing that you need to do is take a step back and actually spend some time thinking about why you want your ex back. Do you truly love them and feel you belong together?

Learn more about The Top 'Get Your Ex Back' Guide here

Sometimes people panic when a breakup occurs because their lives are structured and built around that relationship. It can feel like the world is falling apart to lose that relationship, even when you really don't want to be in it.

Be sure that you really want to pursue the relationship before doing anything to attempt to renew it.

Second: Next you need to evaluate where you are at right now in terms of a relationship with your ex. Did it end fairly quietly or with a gigantic argument? Have you spoken since the breakup? Have you seen each other since the breakup?

Your answers to those questions will determine what direction to move in. If you haven't spoken or seen each other and the relationship ended with a huge fight, you should give it some time before attempting anything to do with how to get your ex back.

Sometimes there needs to be a cooling off period where you both can calm down and get past the hurtful things that may have been said.

The Phone Call: Sometimes the best approach is a simple phone call. You should have a reason for your phone call, however, as you don't want to give away the idea that you miss them at this point.

Instead, come up with a plausible excuse and then call. Assuming the ex is receptive and friendly on the call, it doesn't hurt to ask how they are doing. Make sure you don't get into any blame games.

If they say they're not doing well, the last thing you should say is “well, you shouldn't have left” - that will just start the fighting all over again. Better to say, “I'm sorry to hear that” and leave it at that.

Don't call over and over, by the way.  You don't want to be the one to always be making contact as that will make your ex feel pursued.  While that can be flattering at times, most people are going to feel that you must be desperate if you call frequently. 

The same thing holds true for approaching them.  It is one thing to casually meet up with the ex at a mutual friend's home or the local coffee shop – it's quite another thing to be everywhere they go.  That is going to make them feel like you are a stalker!